Xing, the US

I feel like I grew up stuck in the middle. I was raised by a traditional chinese perspective and moved to the United States and became americanized. There are so many conflicting factors, I was confused for a long time. Charlotte is a small city, so there weren't a lot of people who understood me, which helped me learn to develop myself on my own.

I fell in love with modelling and I think people don't give models enough credit. I also like creative editing and being behind the camera. I want to create an all-women creative agency, for people who are in between cultures. People are becoming more aware of specific cultures, but no one is referencing the big and fixed one.

Last march I had a lot of things going on. It was the beginning of something. I was supposed to do a shoot with Teen Vogue. I was supposed to study in Thailand. I had all the papers signed, only the flight ticket was left. So the pandemic put my life on hold. But that pause taught me a lot. To be patient with myself. I finally learned to enjoy life at the present. I've always been living in the future. I've become closer to myself and closer to my friends and I have realized what friendship really is.

My mother wanted me to grow up more free and that I would get a better education here. My stepdad was diagnosed with cancer and passed away some time ago. So my mother started her own business to provide for us.

I didn't know what subtle racism was until I grew up. We saw all the hate crimes, so we were nervous to find out how people were going to treat us. We didn't go out in public as much as we used to. My friend says she kind of likes it because no one's ever in the way since people are avoiding us and no one is intruding our personal space and I'm kind of on board with that.

I am glad asian culture is more on the radar now. People pay more attention, there are more TV-shows including asians and people realize that us asians are powerful. It's a contrast from when I first moved here and people were asking “Uhm, so do you guys have TVs in China?”

In conclusion, everyone learns and wants to be better. Let's just say that. Better to the earth and better to each other as people.